How I Became a Fujoshi: My Subconscious Had it in For Me

It really wasn’t intentional…

There was a time – a time not really so long ago – when I could watch an anime involving a close male friendship and not ship the pair with a creepy intensity.

Unfortunately that time has past, and the future is now.

I am a fujoshi.

It’s sad, but it’s true.

(And, in my defense, I’m not as bad as my housemate).

It all started with THIS anime:

Free!, Kyoto Animation

I wonder how many innocent girls have morphed into fujoshi because of this show?

I managed to get through the first season of Free! without any incident. My brain was so innocent that I didn’t even get the obvious fan service that was smeared across the show like ¬†black paint.

And then I watched the second season and I had The Dream.

The Dream involved a swimming pool, Haru, Makoto and a kiss.

In The Dream, me, Makoto and Haru all went to the same school. The world in which The Dream was set was a world where same sex relationships were banned. Also in The Dream I had a massive crush on Makoto – I have a massive crush on him in real life, but what girl doesn’t? – so I was very shocked when I saw Haru kissing him in the swimming pool during a swimming lesson. In The Dream Haru was asked to get out of the pool and was arrested. Makoto and I then sprung Haru from jail in an amazingly tense action sequence. Afterwards it was obvious the two of them were going to be together.

In The Dream I was massively disappointed that Makoto and Haru were going to be together, because it meant Makoto and I couldn’t be. In my dreamscape, I remember thinking, “I’m sad that I can’t be together with Makoto, but I’m happy to step aside so he can be with Haru.”

When I woke up I didn’t instantly realise what had happened. It wasn’t until I watched the next episode of Free! Eternal Summer did I notice I no longer saw Makoto and Haru in the same way. They were no longer just best-friends. Nagisa and Rei were no longer just friends. Sosuke’s and Rin’s friendship suddenly seemed a lot more than its face value. Even Momo’s and Ai’s interactions were enough for me to raise a quizzical eyebrow.

The Dream changed me.

The Dream led me to my new OTP, and into launching¬†a load of ships I wouldn’t have otherwise have done so.


And then I had The Second Dream.

This dream had less of an impact than the first, but it drove the point home.

In The Second Dream Haru and I were talking about which of us could take Makoto to certain events. It seemed the two of us were sharing him as a date, diving his time between the two of us equally. It was just odd.

The Second Dream strengthened the confusion of: Would I rather have Makoto to myself, or have him be with Haru?

I still don’t really know the answer.


Confession time is over.

Have a nice day on Planet Earth. I’ll be burning in Fujoshi Hell.

On a side note, Kiss Him Not Me is being made into an anime!!


I haven’t read the manga – I was planning to – but now I’m looking forward to watching the anime!

The only thing that’s funnier than being a fujoshi is watching anime or reading manga about characters who are!




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